Eat, Pray, Love an inspiring read

I hadn’t even thought of picking up Eat, Pray, Love until a co-worker of mine recommended it to me. Kathy, a middle-aged woman who took off for a weekend alone leaving her husband and her grown epileptic son to try to come to terms with her sad and unfulfilled life, is like many women in this world — unhappy and rooted to lives they chose yet don’t have the heart or the mind to leave.

Eat, Pray, Love, a #1 New York Times Bestseller and now a major motion picture, is the true story of Elizabeth Gilbert who, after realizing that life wasn’t all it was cracked up to be, goes out on a limb to find meaning in her life. She and her husband had just bought a house in New York and were in the prime of their lives, ripe for having a baby and starting a family. But Elizabeth didn’t want to be a mother, and she was convinced there was something wrong with her. While Elizabeth grappled with the reality of her life, one nagging thought kept taking over. I don’t want to be married anymore. So she did something about it.

She leaves her husband once and for all and starts to pray, meditate, do yoga, and travel the world. She finds herself in the most unlikely places, in the midst of cultures far beyond anything she’s ever experienced, and fosters friendships with people she never thought she’d meet. Hers is a life guided by the God she never met before, a life that gets sewn back together after a deep unraveling, and a life reshaped by a vision only she can see.

If you haven’t yet read Eat, Pray, Love, get your copy today!

Keeping Gratitude in Thanksgiving

Photo Credit: Ed Yourdon:flickr.com

Now that the holidays are upon us, this is the opportune time to give thanks and feel deep gratitude for everything we have. The yoga studio I go to regularly is holding a two-hour gratitude practice on Thanksgiving morning which I would love to indulge in, but instead I’m going to stay home with my husband and cook our traditional big breakfast together. I’m so thankful for my husband and our marriage, and staying home with him is a choice I’m making. So many people are stuck in bad or even abusive marriages, but I’m so grateful for the husband I have — big, strong, loving, caring, and supportive, and he gives great hugs. We don’t have children, nor do we have family near us, but that’s okay. We spend the holidays alone, and we don’t get invited to anyone’s home for dinner, but we are still grateful because we have a warm home, healthful food, loving pets, a big, warm bed, jobs to pay the bills and then some, two cars in the garage (even if one is a clunker) a phone to hear the voices of faraway loved ones, and a mortgage that we can pay every month.

There are so many people who simply don’t stop to be grateful for what they have. Instead, they focus on what they don’t have, and complain about all the little inconveniences that make life oh, so intolerable. Stop to think for a moment about all the homeless and hungry people out there. They’ve lost their jobs and their homes have been foreclosed on. They stand in line at the shelters with their little children in tow, and cry tears of joy if they can get a bed to sleep in. They eat at soup kitchens and savor the hot food they can get, even if it’s only once a day. They give thanks for whatever comfort they can get.

Let’s give thanks for the roof over our heads, the bed we sleep in, the food in our pantry, the televisions in our living rooms, the money in our checking accounts, the jobs we go to every day even if we don’t like them, and the love of family, friends, and pets. Be thankful for your health and the joy we get from our yoga practice. Envision for a moment what it would be like to be a homeless person, and just be grateful and give thanks that you’re not in their shoes, because if you think some things in life are inconvenient, think of how they have to live.

Namaste, and Happy Thanksgiving.

Crowded train, calm mind

While I’m a part-time yoga teacher I also hold down a full-time job, and I travel by train to and from my job every day. This has it’s ups and downs, but mostly it saves gas and wear and tear on my car. I like to read on the train and most times I can, but lately our beloved transit authority decided to “make things better” by eliminating an essential car from the train I usually take. Seats are now precious, and I have to hustle to get one, or ease my way in and find a reasonable spot where I can hold on for dear life without losing my footing.  Anyway . . . I’m not one to get really aggravated over things like that because the train ride is only about 15 minutes before I can exit and breathe again. . . .so I accept it for what it is.

I had a particularly awful ride on the train two days ago, but my ability to remain calm in times of stress saved me.  I was waiting for the train in the hot summer sun before my long Labor Day weekend when alas, the train arrived pretty much on time — but with only ONE car! How could this be during the busiest time of the day when people are leaving work! Because I didn’t want to wait yet another 15 minutes for the next one (which may or may not be any better), I wiggled my way on to the train that was already overcrowded and stuffed with hot, sweaty bodies eagerly awaiting their trip home. I was stuck pinned to the wall near the door. Thankfully, it would make for a somewhat easy exit. I held my thick library book in the crook of my arm and reached out and supported myself somewhat unsteadily on the door as the train sped south. Stop after stop didn’t deter even more people from getting on, even though there was no room to stand. Luckily as people got on, others got off, but the situation never really got any better. Bodies pressed against each other and young girls were talking on their cell phones, cursing the situation and suffering from claustrophobia. There was a mother and a young boy with a stroller, no less, standing right next to me, and the poor kid was simply lost and could easily get trampled on.

But I remained calm, and even joked with some people instead of getting ruffled and mad. It is what it is. Over 4,000 complaints were lodged with the transit authority since they started this madness a couple of weeks ago so I hope that it’ll go back to the way it was, when seats were available and I could read in relative comfort. In the meantime, I accept it, and I’m grateful for the transportation and for the fact that my job pays for my train pass. While my mind remained calm, I looked forward to the one-mile walk I’d have when I finally released myself from train bondage, and to my yoga room where I could finally breathe again.

Remembering the late Michael Jackson

Since the death of Michael Jackson last Thursday, I am surprised at the feelings that realization has evoked in me.  I was never really a very devoted fan although his music had an impact on my life for over four decades. Remembering him as a child star, it’s difficult to fathom that the 50-year-old man is now gone, and I find myself singing his songs in my head as I go about my day, and yearning for the next bit of news about what his life was really like. His melodic voice reverberates into my very soul and I find myself feeling compassionate and sympathetic toward his family, his children, and the doctor who cared for him during his last moments. I don’t know if we will ever know the whole truth of the enigma that was known as Michael Jackson, but on and off the yoga mat it’s been hard for me to think of anything else.  It makes you think hard about your own mortality.  It also makes you think about what made the man tick as you hear story after story in the media, wondering if this fact or that fact was actually true. All I know is that ten years ago, before I started practicing yoga, the death of Michael Jackson probably wouldn’t have evoked such strong emotions in me, because I was a little more hardened back then.  Yoga has softened me, and the tears come a lot easily now when I hear news of this magnitude about someone I never knew, but who was a part of my life just the same.

Yoga can open new doors and shape new lives

I can’t begin to tell you the countless ways in which yoga has shaped my life.  When I began my practice over eight years ago, I didn’t have a clue about the journey I was undertaking. And I haven’t yet fully reached my destination, and I never really will. Yoga is a journey of the heart and the soul, and once on the path toward realization there is no turning back. Yoga has the capacity to change lives, to light the way and to empower opportunities that we never before thought possible.  Yoga can transform your dull, drab existence to one of light and love and joyous fruits, and there’s nothing you won’t be able to accomplish. The following is one such story that proves my point.

In an article entitled “Yoga Opened Doors She Had Long Ago Closed,” Los Angeles Times (June 5, 2009), writer turned yoga practionioner Colette LaBouff Atkinson spent three hours every day commuting to her writing job, and then spent countless more hours sitting at her desk at home, eating fast food or Mexican take-out.  When she developed excruciating back pain and experienced many sleepless nights, she finally woke up to a reality she hadn’t wanted to face. Her ex-husband had always encouraged her to try yoga, but the words never sunk in.  It was time to revisit that truth, if not to save her back but to save her sanity.

At 39, Colette finally broke down and went to a yoga class on New Year’s Eve.  Eventually, one class turned into four or five a week and she was hooked.  “But in yoga, as anyone and everyone who’s ever benefited from it will say, all kinds of things became possible.  I was there only to breathe; nothing to revise or make again,” says Colette.  “I may not have been calm.  I may not have been supple or limber.  I may not have been still or steady.  But the more I went, day after day, I was different.”

During times when Colette couldn’t sleep, she read a book by F. Scott Fitzgerald called “The Crack-Up,” in which she related to a life that wasn’t exactly going the way he wanted it to. He (Fitzgerald) writes of himself in the third person: “[T[his writer told about his realization that what he had before him was not the dish that he had ordered for his forties. In fact — since he and the dish were one, he described himself as a cracked plate, the kind that one wonders whether it is worth preserving.”

Yoga and meditation bring out your inner truth

When people ask me why I do yoga, I tell them that it helps me to handle the stress that I experience in my day job. By far, that’s not the only reason, but it’s a big one, and until I can make a total shift from nine-to-five to yoga teacher/entrepreneur, yoga always plays a big role in that process, and it is definitely a catalyst for the welcome changes that are manifesting in my life.

Last night I was reading an article entitled “Help Wanted! If Unwelcome Changes at Work are Stressing You Out, Try Using Them as an Opportunity to Discover the Truth of Who You Really Are,” (Yoga Journal, May 2009), and I found myself relating to the experience of many who have, over the years, built their identities by what they do for a living. For those in high-powered, high-stress jobs, like lawyers or doctors, that’s what their lives are all about, and they know nothing else.  Then, a shock wave hits and they’re either laid off or are suddenly faced with a terminal illness and they have to come to grips with who and what they really are. And it’s really hard for some of those people to understand when they’ve been so conditioned to base their total identities on their occupations, their resumes, their accomplishments and yes, their failures. Their lives are mired in stress, and they don’t believe, or don’t want to believe, there’s any way out. Even the thought of taking a leisure vacation is out of the question.

The article features the story of litigation lawyer, Carol Urzi, who worked in a large San Francisco law firm. She was working 24/7 and managing 50 cases on her trial calendar. Needless to say, she centered her life around her work.  She “enjoyed the intensity, the feeling of triumph over difficulties, and the recognition from others for being the highest biller,” says Carol.  Then, she was suddenly laid off and, while she felt shocked and angry (how could this happen to me??) she embraced yoga and teamed up with a law clerk who had been practicing Zen Buddism meditation for many years.  She could never understand how this person always remained so centered, so quietly in control of his life amid the stress and chaos of the law firm they both worked at.

While recovering from her powerlessness and anger from being laid off, her yoga practice helped her to find new meaning in her life.  Ten years after being laid off, she has the flexibility to pursue studies and interests she was never able to focus on before when she worked around the clock.  She does pro bono legal work, is involved in local politics, and she even travels.  She has finally found her true self from yoga and meditation, and she no longer identifies herself with her work, but who she has become, inside, as a whole person.

We must all learn to bend with the ups and downs of life and expect that they will change at any moment. By cultivating a regular yoga and/or meditation practice, you will achieve patience and compassion for others and, at the same time, accept the uncertainties of life and learn how not to panic when a curve ball gets thrown at you. You will also feel calmer and be able to handle problems more effectively as they manifest in your life, be they job changes, relationships or health issues.

Yoga is a powerful remedy, and it has the power to change lives.

Smell the roses and just “be” in the moment

Stop and smell the roses

Do you ever stop what you’re doing to just be in the moment? In the words of Jon Kabat-Zinn, “Most of us need to be given permission to switch from the doing to the being mode, mostly because we have been conditioned since we were little to value doing over being.” This is a very powerful quote and one that we should ponder about fully.

Is your life so hectic and full of stuff to do that you can’t stop and smell the roses or let your body truly rest and relax? Do you ever set aside time just for you or are you always multi-tasking and catering to the needs of other people to the detriment of your own well-being? Women usually have a tendency to need to feel needed, and are always making sure that those around us are taken care of, even if they are fully capable of taking care of themselves. In the meantime, we forget that we need loving care, too. We must make the effort to just be in the moment instead of worrying about who’s going to drive the kids to soccer practice or whether dinner is on the table at the appointed time. It’s time to turn off the cell phone, take a walk in your yard or in a neighborhood park, squish your feet in the sand on a beach, sip a cappucino at a local cafe, curl up in front of a fire and read a good book, or take that yoga class you’ve been wanting to get to but seem to never have the time.

We have to stop rushing around every minute of the day and start living quality lives.  Make time for yoga, for meditation, for a bubble bath, for pruning your roses, or have lunch with an old friend. Don’t worry about the pile of laundry, the rain spots on your windows, or the dishes in the sink. Tomorrow will come in good time.